Sonnets

In death I must beseech my maker’s mind
To give account and reason for this pain
Why dost thou send me on a quest to find
True love, if thou dost not let me attain
And why should all the days I have be spent
In search of that sweet angel I desire
If thou in jest or even fair intent
Allows my heart to fall yet not acquire
I feel as if I am the moth who strives
And flutters ever closer to the flame
Yet only to be burned when he arrives
As if this was his journey’s only aim
And thus has fear began to fill this night
That ever shall I chase illusion’s light

10/9/09

Though peace and calm parade upon my skin
And outward this tranquility refined
Inside a war is raging deep within
Between this heart and this distracted mind
As I continue stepping to the ledge
And creeping ever closer to the line
I wonder what lies past the waiting edge
Where woe or joy or both may yet be mine
And thus I stand in war and peace combined
These window eyes attempt to hide the fray
I’m showing sunlight pictures to the blind
At midnight painting pictures of the day
Yet through deceit the war cannot be won
Tis more than just the eyes that know the sun

2/8/10

Though I have cleared the air of that sweet sound
And I have freed my eyes of that fair sight
I hear the silent echoes dance around
And see the shadows in the black of night
Though I have cut the badges from my sleeve
And I have snipped the strings upon my wrist
Still left behind are stains that will not leave
Like ashes after fire still persist
Though I have worn a mask that now is gone
And I have lived a caterpillar’s dream
I feel the sunlight touch the dew at dawn
And every droplet’s memory of the stream
For I could move a thousand miles away
And still be inching closer every day

6/9/09

If not an end, how can be measured death
For even sleep has function in its cause
Thy lungs have not a purpose but for breath
And hearts may only choose from beat or pause
And every outcome surely plays a part
In something new or what must after come
No end arrives that fails to bring a start
No night was born that did not day become
And for a cycle to its name attest
Must every sow lead always to a reap
For only if it’s brief can it be rest
And only if we rise are we asleep
Thus death to life is merely a respite
Between the day and that sweet morning light

6/5/09

Oh what if words could change a beating heart
Or in some combination shift a mind
What power would I have in that sweet art
What fleeting dream could language help me find
Would happiness be fooled by trickery
Would kisses be as sweet as the unknown
Would not the dream of her to some degree
Be greater if it happened on its own
Without a sly persuasion to compel
Without the power of confusion’s word
Would truth and sadness in a season dwell
Or would illusion be instead preferred
Though powerless they be the words I speak
Tis more than Love’s mirage that I still seek

11/11/08

Thy heart is not immortal but thy voice
Might sing throughout eternity or more
Where future ears shall listen and rejoice
To sounds that echo from a distant shore
And oft these ears may wonder whence it came
Or who among them ever sang as sweet
What voice could turn a snowflake into flame
What words could bring the winter’s only heat
And thus it is a blessing I may see
The face beneath this angel’s perfect song
To know thy words and what they mean to thee
To touch thy heart and know that I belong
I stand in awe of everything you are
I live in wonder next to heaven’s star

10/23/08

If I could only see with those brown eyes
And feel what seasons play upon thy heart
Would I be standing under sunlit skies
Or would the winter tear my world apart
If I could only hear with those fair ears
And feel the rhythm singing to thy soul
Would I be lifted high in joyous tears
Or would the sadness take my self control
If I could only feel what thou must feel
And know the secrets hidden in thy mind
Would flawless visions unto me reveal
Or would my heart and sorrow be entwined
Perhaps if but a moment I were thee
Thy suffering and solace I would see

7/31/08

To see thee is to Love thee, this I know
Or false be every thought that once were true
No sun hath shone nor star did ever glow
That Loved thee not when thee were still in view
To hear thee is to Love thee, this I deem
That every word thy lips impart is sweet
If not, then silence be the perfect dream
To hear thee not, nor any sound repeat
To touch thee is to Love thee, this I say
Tis true beyond all truth encountered yet
That surely I would crumble either way
To touch thee now or never hath we met
Yet I shall live in want the coming days
And Love thee in a thousand different ways

3/31/08

I see thy heart hath broken in thy chest
Thy tears recite the story from the eyes
As words they fall and falling do attest
Thy tale of many sorrows and goodbyes
And thus my heart reluctantly succumbs
As if thy tears have authored some for me
And tearful one now quickly two becomes
For thine now fall for me and mine for thee
And so a moment lays its claim on time
When bound are we forever linked by tear
Two hearts in rhythm as two words in rhyme
Lie incomplete without the other near
Thus two alone with loneliness inside
Can fall in Love if fallen tears collide

2/28/08

How can be cast forever in mere words
The sorrow when an angel softly cries
How can be laid immortal in a verse
The beauty that exists within her eyes
What picture could I paint would be as real
As watching sunlight fall upon her face
What story could I tell would ever feel
As warm as watching her unequaled grace
What scent could come that ever would compete
With holding her as hours wander by
What fruit could fall that ever tastes as sweet
As kissing her beneath a starlit sky
And thus her beauty’s song forever goes
Unsung by any word, or sight, or rose

3/27/08

Tis when my heart doth leap that sadness seems
To visit in that minute that will follow
As if the sun with quickly darkened beams
Dost fill with black the once white laden hollow
And I am left to wonder or to find
What cause can be for this quick season’s turn
How can tomorrow once in spring defined
So quickly feel the chill of winter’s burn
And why hath this blue orb so often spun
If not to echo back the seasons past
Does change not end what changing has begun
Nor mend a heart then break it just as fast
These questions asked for I have failed to see
What keepest summer here and thou with me

3/26/08

What shall I dream if dreams are not to own
Tis hard to know a pleasure unknown still
How can I change what I am nightly shown
How can I dream a dream against my will
What shall I want if wants are not to see
Tis hard to move a tree whose roots are set
How can I change what long has anchored me
How can be wanted that unwanted yet
What shall I hope if hopes are not to keep
Tis hard to alter pieces of the heart
How can I change my vision of the deep
How can I cease to need yet not depart
There are two ways desires can be lost
Achieved or sadly never even crossed

2/11/08

Perhaps the moon is not the moon at all
But rather just the sadness of the sun
A somber face where woe doth nightly fall
A lonely thought that shall be not outrun
And thus may be the winter to the year
Is not just cold nor but the season’s dance
Perhaps the snow a little frozen tear
Perhaps the cold a Love not given chance
For I as well with sunlight my disguise
Will cover up the moon within my soul
So false the light that shines upon my skies
Though dark the cell, the day is my parole
To know the truth ye must not seek the light
It lies not with the day, but with the night

1/25/08

Oh rich reward, oh sweet intoxicant
Thou offers what no other can provide
The drive to dare, the courage to confront
The secret place where her and I collide
Oh toxic aid, oh valor giving dame
Can thou but offer refuge for my heart
To shelter me from adoration’s flame
To close my eyes and further my depart
Oh spirits cold, adorned in colored glass
Can thou not take me where I long to be
Among the prose, amid the dreams that pass
With her in Love in thee shall I but see
There lives a place where Heaven can be mine
The bottle’s end, exhausted of its wine

1/22/08

I beg thee not yet may these words persuade
Thy heart to face the sunlight’s perfect gleam
To turn my way unbound and unafraid
So life may live as equals with the dream
For dreaming still as wondrous as it seems
Is torture if the sunlight brings reverse
By morning if tis lost among the beams
Unknown to I which life or dreams be worse
So thence must I go find a place to be
Where we in Love can Love by lighted day
To lay thy heart with mine and mine with thee
If not to find it now to waste away
Love settles not for secrecy or shame
Love gives thee light if ye can do the same

1/22/08

Farewell! Farewell! To thee shall sad goodbye
Be spoken softly in this woeful word
The lark must drop the boulder if to fly
And fly must he or else be not a bird
Farewell! Farewell! My sweet elusive dream
Tis time to wake and greet the morning sun
For though in rare illusion life may gleam
Is forfeit not the race if never run?
Farewell! Farewell! Now onward shall I go
The world is yet far and I am free
To chase if but to chase the very glow
That lost in slumber I could never see
Yet anguish not in parting or disdain
I leave you free, thy freedom to attain

1/17/08

I have not seen thee, yet I know thy face
As if the sculptor’s hands were but my own
The curves that ever redefine thy grace
The beauty that no earthly view has shown
I have not held thee, yet I know thy touch
As if t’were but the air upon my skin
The sunlight I shall feel but never clutch
The flame that flickers on the walls within
I have not met thee, yet I know thy heart
As if the quiet cadence called my name
The secret song no journey shall impart
The perfect dream no wisdom shall exclaim
Yet ’til this life doth mingle dream and fate
I shall in sweet submission lie in wait

1/17/08

The sun knows not what lies beneath the sea
His rays may only reach a shallow deep
Nor can the sun reveal unto the sea
The wonders of the sky where he doth sleep
The mountains ever standing cannot lie
As humble as the fern beneath the oak
Nor can the fern yet taste the wondrous high
Or echo back the voices clouds have spoke
And each may pray upon the other’s lot
To trade or seek the mighty or the meek
Yet now in view the wonders that were sought
Tis but return to comfort they would seek
Feel mighty not nor ever self condemn
Each knows a marvel hidden but to them

11/16/07

Quick reaper of all youth why dost thou come
With haste in thy endeavor I implore
In claiming mine what more shall ye become
What gained thee now not found in thee before
Most surely what thou take must treasure be
Thou would not come if worthless was the loot
And grand must be the place where keepest thee
Thy bounty ye have made in thy pursuit
Yet what returneth me in this accord
For trade I have not heard thy offer yet
Thou surely would not take without reward
Nor leave no restitution for thy debt
T’would be a shame if this be dying’s truth
That nothing comes in barter for thy youth

11/16/07

Art thou now the barest autumn tree
With leaves but now a piece of heaven’s awe
Not hung aloft nor dancing still with thee
But scattered now in some design of flaw
Art thou now the longest winter’s night
The cloud that thunders ere the morning’s shine
The darkest sky to call upon thy sight
The moon that cannot shine since thee were mine
Art thou now the saddest of thy dreams
The might to be, had only thee some might
To give a gift with permanence it seems
Now taken back to lie with thee at night
Tis wrong a wish that wishes on thee pain
Tis wronger still to wish thee back again

11/16/07

Make use of any tool that fills your sight
To mend if but to mend thy very mirth
Tis not the nail that fears the hammer’s bite
Tis one but needs the other for its worth
Make light of any dark that fills your mind
To turn thy world ’round or end-on-end
Tis not the ghostly dark that ye shall find
Tis but the light ye cannot comprehend
Make haste in your endeavor to make glee
For any moment spent if spent in sorrow
Tis not a moment lost nor lost in thee
Tis but a moment etched in time’s tomorrow
For life may like the circle start anew
And bring the moments passed back into view

10/25/07

When that sweet sunset finishes the day
And stars begin to peek from curtains drawn
Upon the stage I promptly go and play
My nightly role of triumph ere the dawn
When moonlight is the brightest light to see
And all the daily drudgery is done
With haste in my illusion shall I be
Where thee cannot by waking be outdone
When sheets are clouds but inches in the sky
And each new flame diminishes its glow
To toil I do gladly say goodbye
For quickly to thy window must I go
By day am I a prisoner of chore
By night am I the prince outside thy door

10/23/07

Can hearts be burst while still in rhythm beat
That single tune familiar to the chest
That same old song that oft is heard complete
While walking that same path I have digressed
Can tears be lost in such a way that pain
May occupy more space in heart than thee
Or fall in ways no breath may I attain
Nor light upon the eyes that I may see
Can adoration cause eternal rest
In ardor may the final morning shine
Will true be all these things if I attest
My life is done if not to make thee mine
Tis not so bad should I be sent above
What much is worse, that I shall die of Love

10/23/07

Why still I write the words already writ
Or give to paper old familiar friends
If not in that same place must I still sit
Or in beginning still have made no ends
Why still I hope the same old beaten hope
Or dream a dream that many nights have seen
If not exists today the very scope
Before, with any progress still unseen
Why still I praise the angel of my verse
Or offer words anew that have been sent
What outcome can be thought as bad or worse
As Loving still the Love that I lament
If not for You, for nothing shall I live
If not for You, my heart has naught to give

10/23/07

When seasons passed have crumbled to the ground
The very place in which these words were born
A haunting echo passing through in sound
Will hint of secrets waiting and forlorn
When father time has taken all my wit
And covered up the visions of my eye
A wisdom still will quietly emit
A lesson as it slowly says goodbye
When time has come to steal away the day
And barter me in laughter with the night
The teacher to his pupil will display
A smile as he tells him he was right
To Heaven chase, to touch the skies above
To have it not if not to chase for Love

10/23/07

Thou art so fair as but to winter mock
Or taunt the snow that falls upon the tree
To tease the moss that gathers on the rock
And let the cold not bear its will on thee
Thou art so pure the purest form to be
A deep that fills the deepest ocean dreams
To make a jealous water of the sea
And turn the blue a subtle shade of green
Thou art so full of beauty as to shun
The lighted birth of rainbow on the sky
A sweet not any flower has outdone
Nor any fruit yet able to supply
So give me life, and all its glory be
Quite useless, if thou spends it not with me

10/19/07

Time in slumber shall be never found
Nor one in rest he ever shall be caught
No moment lives in which he will be bound
By any thing that can be made or thought
Elusive is the dream to slip his sight
Or find in shelter but a place to hide
No dark shall be the shadow in his light
No guilt shall ride the face upon his pride
And any effort spent is effort lost
As if to change direction of the sun
A man so many mornings may exhaust
Yet find the task still futile and undone
Better spent are moments in your prime
In savor of your own fair bit of time

10/19/07

Tis but my fathers mirror I shall be
A vision of an image in the past
A window to lost days for all to see
A moment drifting softly in the vast
And like the tiny acorn to the oak
Remains beyond all greatness in the meek
Waiting under shade and sunlight stroke
To rise in time when he has reached his peak
I’ll take my turn upon the sultry sky
And offer shade to thee as given me
For grace and form on him do I rely
For lessons have I learned to give to thee
What act could I become but he rehearsed
What second could I be were he not first

10/19/07